Chapter 142: What He Longed For

“Why are you overthinking this?” Shen Fuyu glanced at him. “Is it really that important?”

To be honest, she wasn’t quite sure how to explain it to Qin Zhiyi. She could only say that, as a person with a modern mindset at her core, responsibility and duty were deeply ingrained in her soul. When one is in trouble, everyone should lend a hand—that was something she considered natural.

In short, socialism was the way to go.

But she wouldn’t say this to Qin Zhiyi. Wisdom and ideas needed to be accumulated gradually, passed down from ancestors, to build an unshakable spirit. From her perspective, she dared not bring all modern wisdom and thoughts into this world recklessly; a single misunderstanding could lead to a narrow and one-sided view, a mistake impossible to undo.

Yet Qin Zhiyi was upset. He suddenly felt a great distance between himself and Shen Fuyu. He had thought such matters would make her happy, earn her approval, and so on—but none of that happened. She was so calm, so indifferent. Then what was the point of all she had done? And what was the point of his own passion?

Qin Zhiyi was angry, inexplicably angry.

It seemed he was angry at Shen Fuyu, but more so, he was angry at himself.

Shen Fuyu watched him sulk over the desk and felt frustrated.

Angry at himself again!

Why was this man competing with her for resentment?

So annoying!

To stabilize the tension, Shen Fuyu had to try to ease Qin Zhiyi’s mood. She thought everyone went through such troubles when young, so his sulking was understandable.

Hmph, who hasn’t been mad at themselves for failing to meet expectations in youth? But as someone who had been through it, Shen Fuyu believed one shouldn’t fall into constant self-denial; otherwise, the pressure becomes unbearable. Even if you don’t meet your goals, the effort along the way proves growth.

“All right, Your Majesty,” Shen Fuyu said, cupping her face and leaning closer. “You really don’t have to think so much.”

“Well… if we’re being honest, my master is the real expert, isn’t he? These medicines were all left to me by him,” Shen Fuyu began fabricating a story. “Not to mention my master, but speaking for myself, I don’t care about fame and success. I believe what matters more is doing what you want to do. Regardless of fame or gain, I want to save them. I have the ability, so I don’t hesitate to use the medicine. If I only used it to seek fame by saving them, that would be putting the cart before the horse.”

She wanted to raise the stakes, which was why she dared to challenge those no one else would. Living in a patriarchal, feudal society, she still firmly believed in her freedom.

Because she had always done what she wanted.

Qin Zhiyi looked up at her, remaining silent for a long time. Yet Shen Fuyu’s unwavering gaze seemed to become an invisible encouragement. In his eyes, she was no longer just Shen Fuyu—she was light, hope, everything he yearned for…

“It seems I have been narrow-minded,” Qin Zhiyi finally said.

He quickly understood Shen Fuyu’s meaning and found himself genuinely admiring her. In this world, women faced more restrictions, yet Shen Fuyu seemed freer than any man. She couldn’t be compared to a mere sparrow or eagle.

If she were an eagle, she chose to flutter like a sparrow on the branches.

If she were a sparrow, she had the confidence to contend with eagles.

“So, Your Majesty, please don’t be upset!” Shen Fuyu smiled warmly. “I really have no way to coax you anymore. If you stay mad, I’ll have to sing for you.”

“?” Qin Zhiyi frowned, then pointed at the door. “Go away.”

He still hadn’t recovered from the shock! Could she not feel the mood? Such a good atmosphere, and she had to ruin it?

“I’m confident in my singing!” Shen Fuyu put her hands on her hips. That was right; let the resentment turn toward her!

“I don’t trust your song choices!” Qin Zhiyi was annoyed. God knows what strange songs she had sung before, even making up dances that looked like twisted folk routines. He didn’t want to hear any of it!

“Tch.”

Shen Fuyu pouted.

She thought those rustic party songs were quite catchy. As long as they didn’t disturb anyone, watching elders dance in the square was pretty entertaining.

Young people really didn’t like this kind of music.

“Enough,” Qin Zhiyi said, surrendering. Seeing Shen Fuyu eager to perform reminded him of the troubles he endured yesterday. “There’s the autumn hunt in September.”

“Let’s go, let’s go!” Shen Fuyu brightened up. Autumn hunt was great. She liked such occasions; it was a rare new experience for her. Of course, she wanted to go!

Qin Zhiyi: …

He was trying to keep Shen Fuyu in the palace!

“Do you think your belly can keep up with the autumn hunt?” Qin Zhiyi frowned, staring at her. “You usually sneaking over walls without being seen is one thing, but the autumn hunt involves a long journey. Are you going to go while showing your belly? Aren’t you afraid of being exposed?”

“But by September, my belly should be about four months along,” Shen Fuyu patted the flesh on her stomach. “Four months is pretty safe from miscarriage. You can pretend you got a medicine from a master to protect the fetus. If you say that, then riding a horse for a bit shouldn’t be a problem.”

She wanted to ride a horse! She had never ridden one before!

In modern times, it wasn’t easy to ride horses. She never had a special status before, so she rarely got close to horses. Now that she had the chance, no one could stop her!

No one!

Qin Zhiyi fell silent. But indeed, by September, it would be about four months. A little outing wouldn’t be a big deal. Speaking of pregnancy, he asked, “What about Concubine Hui?”

“She’ll miscarry in about a month,” Shen Fuyu said calmly. “Or maybe two months, since it’s a false pregnancy. It’s just the residual side effects of the medicine causing the illusion. Once the side effects fade, the child will naturally disappear.”

“That’s just ridiculous,” Qin Zhiyi said. “I saw the imperial physician take her pulse and he said it seemed like a male fetus.”

“Yes, Concubine Hui wants a son so badly that’s why it appears to be a male fetus,” Shen Fuyu shrugged. “The Dream of Spring Night pill is a hallucinogenic medicine, so naturally it has hallucinatory side effects. Since Hui wants a son, the side effects adapt to her desires.”

Everything would seem real, but she couldn’t carry the pregnancy long. Hui would definitely miscarry soon, and that would be quite a show. Shen Fuyu looked forward to it and even wondered if she should give Hui a little push to make sure she lost the child!